Silly things happen sometime

and it happen for some reasons. ( i've always have great faith on that) 

As for today, i bet some alterations in behaviour are needed.

and surprise surprise ! i am willing to change :)

Really we learn as we age.

During my  late childhood life, i know pretty well that some changes in life are necessary for survival,

but then i never had come to a phase that i really willing to. Everything is kinda stable (or at least they look like one).so why do i have to change? Seriously,why? I can't see any logicity there.

but hey, why not ? 

erm,now i just need some times to make it happen.

Hopefully i can come out with lemonade out of a lemon :) 

(this is also a reminder to me to appreciate those who accept me as me more than before!)

Living a routine life

Fariez bagun super early this morning :) bukan sebab fariez tidur awal, fariez tido agak lewat jugak, 12 something. (Tidur pukul 12 malam dah consider lewat la kan, sebab subuh here around 3.30) Fariez bangun semangat-semangat because i know that today i'm going to do something extraordinary- buat donut !

i think i'm tired of doing a routine life. Rountiness are so boring kan? now Fariez da sedar kenapa macam hari-hari pun bermalas-malasan. I'm actually sick of rountiness.(is there such a word as rountiness ?) Somehow rasa, rutin hari-hari bagi false feeling  that everything is okie and stable.wheres, they are NOT. Rasa takde improvement dalam hidup.

itula, i am very glad that dayah did mention bout donuts last day. since i know how to make it, so willingly i offer to make some donuts for her. (i know she wouldn't mind if i lupa or tiba-tiba malas nk buat ) lgpun, sebenarnya, i'm hidding the fact that i yang nak makan donut-donut tu .kekeke.but anyway, i managed to wake up early,and start doing the donuts job.. and tarraaa ~ altogether 30 bijik cute donuts :)

my camera was left at liza's, pic taken guna hp for twicpic. it's not bad at all.

I did bungkus for Dayah, Nik and Sarah. i left some for my housemates (even i know donut is nothing fancy compare to roti sosej yang tkay buat :P )  I ate like 5. and the rest i share with my classmates, yang duduk sebelah-sebelah, depan dan belakang fariez je la kan. but unfortunately, fariez tak nmpak Nik pun hari ni..did he attend the lecture, anyway? Sarah pun tak dtg jugak. :(

will find someday untuk buat donut for Sarah n Nik.

I'm thinking of making burger malaysia (ape name sebenar dia eh?) this is only for the sake of breaking down my daily rountine life.Ada sape-sape teringin? i can always bring extra burger malaysia to the class :D

diagnosis sendiri -case dermatology

Geli mat ? :D
(gambar-gambar ni Fariez kutip-kutip kt Google search)

rambling

Wehuu. Update blog sebelum pergi ke emedicine.com!

1st of all, sesiapa rasa diri dia jenis suka mengarah. suruh orang buat kerja itu ini. get lost please! sakit hati betul tau ada kawan perangai macam ni. bluerk! Kau da la nak suruh-suruh orang buat kerja , lepas tu tak reti pulak nak cakap elok-elok. Kau igt orang suka? Saya tak suka okie!!

Tapi Frz mcm tak kuat la, tak reti nak cakap taknak. pastu macam patuh je la...tp tak puas hati. mmg confirm tak ikhlas kan apa yang Frz buat tu.

Anyway, sekarang Fariez da start clinical round Dermatology. Kalau nk di comparekan department opthal dgn department dermato..pergh macam  langit planet pluto dgn bumi.Jauh beza! 

1st the building itself. Building dia sangat horror,i told ya, Even there is one place which look no different from kawasan pelupusan sampah, nyamuk lalat are everywhere.(sapa y penah tangok would understand what i mean, tak ramai kot perasan tempat tu, sebab it's really a hidden place). 2ndly bout the classes..erm  so-so je la.. Tapi sekarang da hari ke-5, tak sangka semua bende pun macam bearable je.i mean boleh je la telan semua bende. takde la rs sangat sangat stress ke ape.

but u know, apa yang bagus pasal derm?  even clinical round sampai 5 jam.. Clinical case sentiasa je ada. Tak pernah putus-putus. Satu case ada la sampai 2 -3 orang patient. Sehari nak dekat sepuluh orang patient jugakla yang kitorang tgk.A very good exposure should i say.

Clinical picture of the patients pun sangat obvious, no need history taking banyak -banyak , no need maneuver and all. palpate sana palpate sini takde okie.A very simple job, we just need to observe the patient, touch sikit-sikit (if the lesion is not contagious and if ada gloves) then we are done.muahaha. i'm loving it! ( Walaupun sedikit busan sebab ulang-ulang bende yang sama ) but still, it's wayyy to simple! to be compared with internal Med whose patient with presented with chest problem, heart problem, yada yada yada oh so complicated.

Hehe. Sapa perasan wishlist Fariez tahu la kot, that Fariez would like to continue her study in dermatology and become a Dermatologist. (if God willing, insyallah). even before entering the clinical year lagi, Fariez already had it on mind. But that time rasa mcm, No, i cannot quickly jump to my decision..bcause i've so many things to discover, mana tahu tiba-tiba minat O&G ke,Pead ke, surgery ke? uh surgery?? hahaha.

Thinking that i've to do pervaginal examination gave me a palpitation. Thinking that i've never did the per vaginal exam on a real patient, urgh double my palpitation!

So far O&G mmg tolak tepi. I do feel that, being a female doc, i'm more responsible untuk amik O&G. Tapi, macam mana ni? Fariez tak minat O&G.n seriously, i do feel bad bout that.(but, i not going to bear the risk (again) for choosing something that i'm not interested in. No way!) 

Pernah suatu hari tu,rasa sangat tertampar, bila this surgeon with other O&G doctors directly sound.. "Korang ni jangan la fikir nak senang je, nak jadi opthalmologist, dermatologist, lecturer.. " Dang! how they know i'm going to  choose derm? I still remember,masa tu, one of my friends terus made her mind nk jadi surgeon. haha, Fariez pun, mcm out of sudden became so very euthusiastic, n i was like  "baekla! saya bercita-cita nak jd pakar sakit puan" but the truth is, it's just a saying coming out without much thinking. 

Ohmy, da panjang frz type.*benti pergi dapur minum susu jap*

er. tak tahu dah nk sambung type apa.okiela, kapan-kapan ketemu lagi.da~

First Things First

First things are the things that me, personally, find of most worth. Blogging buat fariez puas hati n happy but it's so not my priorty. not worth my time pun. So kena belajar, untuk buat bende yang priority walaupun tak bape nak suka, and leave things that have less priority (even suka) aside.

Walaubagaimana pun, sy blogging jugak .ngee.tapi pendek dan akan mengambil masa 10 minit je. :)
Hari ni saya penat, mak selalu ckp " kalau angota badan tak melekat kat badan, entah-entah hilang kat mana-mana je" sebab i'm such a careless and clumsy lil girl (in the past la kan)

Tp hari ini sy rasa, alhamdulillah anggota badan sy masih melekat di badan, cause at this moment, seriously, rasa penat sangat sangat macam semua kaki tangan rasa nak tercabut.

itu sahaja.sekian.

P/s: group sy, group no 2 dapat tempat ke-dua.yeah! we are beautiful aren't we? *buat muka cute*

End of Opthal

hoyeah hoyeah. Da abes mid term Opthal!

(takyah baca yang bawah-bawah ni,takde pekdah untuk korang pun)

Sebelum exam takde la concentrate on study je.maen je game, tgk cerita, tido, jalan-jalan. Cumanya bila da habis exam boleh buat semua aktiviti tu dgn senang hati tanpa rasa bersalah.yeah! Selalu lepas exam mesti ada plan keluar makan, tapi exam kali ni tak plan pape.Fariez fikir nak duduk rumah berlatih jd houswife je kot. huahua.

ye ye je kan.. bila exam da habis, sibuk-sibuk nak ikut Tkay pergi Carefour. Padahal dalam poket ada bape keping je la duit 5 pound.Takpe kat carefour kan ada ATM kata hati. Nasib Fariez tak ikut kata hati.. last-last decide balik rumah jela, save duit.. takpun pergi rumah Sab.tgk ikan-ikan diorang. Dgr kate, sekarang diorang da aktif berkebun pulak.

Tapi last-last Fariez tak balik rumah pun, called Liza pastu Liza ajak makan dekat Kafe Asrama Mara. Wohoo~ ada ABC! Mana nak cari ABC dekat mesir? Di pendekkan cerita ondaway nk pergi Kafe tu jumpe Hani. Gembira.. i mean.. macam dulu-dulu.. lepas exam selalu hangout sama-sama. (Hani, Nana, Liza n Bob).
So Fariez rasa mcm, canteknya perjalanan hidup kita yang Allah da tentukan.

Sampai dekat Kafe tu , Nana ade sekali kat sana.End up, kitorang lunch bersama-sama. Sweet tak?hehe.

Jumpe Nawwar dgn Ona juga. Happy dapat jumpe housemate lama,(sarah je takde)..kongsi-kongsi cerita. Rindu laa kat diorang. aish.

Ona cakap, oh frz buat redvelvet eh, ona baca kat blog.Kalau takde org nak mkn, Ona ade je :) Masa ona ckp tu, Fariez rasa macam.. Hua~ Hari tu kek velvet Fariez tak larat nak habiskan, housemate Fariez pun sama. ( Azzah pun buat cake jugak : Carrot cake) Memang da terigat nak pergi rumah Ona nak hantar redvelvet tu.Serius! nyesal tak pergi je rumah Ona!

Fariez masuk dalam tupperware kek tu, bawak pergi rumah Bob je.Ada banyak lagi kat rumah. tak tahu nk kasi sape.boleh?

Tiba-tiba kan masa sembang-sembang, dapat sms dr Tkay. "Kak Fariez, hari ni ATM lapaa, dia makan (telan) card orang! " Gosh, alhamdulillah fariez tak ikut pergi carefour, kalau tak nak buat apa kat carefour dgn poket kosng. Bayar teksi pun tak lepas.

Penari zapin - anak didik Cikgu Hamdan

Gambar sambutan hari guru 12 tahun lepas.. Fariez rasa ni la set-set yang bajet bagus, bajet otai masa sekolah rendah  padahal sememeh je.(dlm gmbr skema! :) )

Anyways, Baru-baru ni, fariez called rumah tau, sembang-sembang dgn adek bongsu,kitorang panggil die Boy. Boy sekarang dah form 4, belajar dekat MRSM somewhere in Perak.Kakak dia la yang paksa dia msuk sekolah tu, bukan kemahuan dia. Dia lagi suka sekolah lama, Sekolah Agama Nazrin. Disebabkan kakak dia yang paksa, maka kakak rasa bertanggungjawab nk monitor study adek dia.

"Adek exam macam mana? Mak cakap ko fail sejarah?"

terus dgr die jerit-jerit marah kat mak, sbb bitau akak yang dia fail. Manja! dgn mak tak takut.

"mana ada fail Sejarah, mak silap la..adek fail Bio la " T__T lagi teruk!

Lepas tu adek bagi alasan, cikgu perempuan yang mengajar tu selalu masuk kelas asyik nak marah-marah je. Setiap hari ada je bende die nak marah. Lepas tu merajuk tak nak mengajar. Tak suka. Then mak fariez cerita, memang la.. cikgu tu pregnant, orang pregnant mmg la cepat marah-marah.

Lepas tu adek mmg kene berleter la dgn kakak dia.Fariez perasan je dia da bad mood bila Fariez marah-marah. Tapi gasak la, kalau tak nasihat, tak di tegur, Fariez jugak yang akan menyesal nanti.

Sebenarnya, waktu menuntut ilmu ni. Benda paling penting sekali ialah jangan mengata cikgu. Walaupun cikgu tu teruk ke, tak bagus ke , suka marah-marah ke. Diamkan je, buat tak tahu. Jangan bukak cerita pasal cikgu bercerita bende-benda tak elok pasal cikgu dgn kawan-kawan.Lepas tu kene elakkan dari pada sakitakn hati cikgu.Jangan nak salahkan cikgu bila tak faham dalam kelas.

Barula ilmu yang sampai berkat.

Kalau pandai cemerlang , tapi tak reti hormat cikgu-cikgu tak guna kot.

Sebenarnya Fariez rasakan Fariez dapat UPSR 5A, PMR 8A, SPM 10A1 adalah disebabkan doa-doa mak baba dan cikgu-cikgu. Apalah la sangat usaha kita kalau dibandingkan dengan usaha cikgu-cikgu yang mengajar.

Selamat Hari Guru buat semua guru yang menabur bakti kepada anak bangsa!

P/s : tau ke yang mana satu Fariez dlm gambar tu?
 nampak tak kat blackboard tu, ade tulis Selamat Hari Guru it was my hand writting. not bad kan.

Red velvet Cake

Mula-mula Fariez suka kek ni sebab colour dia merah (fariez suka merah). Tapi sekarang Fariez suka kek ni sebab rasa dia. Bau die waktu panas-panas..pastu combination kek dgn chessee frosting.Sempurna! (Perfect)

P/s:Rasa nak buat kek lagi. tapi sape pulak la yang nak makan kek banyak-banyak kan.

berkawan

Pernah suatu hari dulu (masa Fariez rajin beli readers digest 2 3 tahun lepas ) ada satu topik ni pasal living healthy.Ala,to be exact mainly cerita pasal diet. Pasal pemakanan seimbang,macam mana nak kurus. Menarik kot. Ah tipula kalau ada perempuan yang tak berminat pasal diet.well, wanita kan such an insecure creature. selalu dibelenggu insecurity....uh

anyways,Fariez nk recall pun tak igt banyak, tp Fariez igt ada satu point ni. Dalam RD, die kata.. Kalau org tu gemuk,kawan-kawan dia juga bersize yang sama. sebab katanya, kawan-kawan mempengaruhi lifestyle kita. contoh suka makan luar bersama-sama. Maka sama-sama gemuk.Fakta ni Fariez share dgn kawan rapat fariez 2 3 tahun lepas. Dia juga berbadan agak besar.

Hari ni dia igtkan balik Fariez pasal fakta tu.tapi dimodify sikit soalannya.

"igt tak, awak pernah cerita pasal kawan gemuk, nanti kita pun ada tendency untuk jadi gemuk? Selama 5 tahun kenal saya, apa yang awak dapat daripada sy?" lebih kurang la soalan dia.Adakah Fariez da gemuk?

Terdiam sekejap Fariez. Terus terigat waktu pertama kenal dia, kalau nak dihitung sampai  ke hari ini.wah,banyak kot bende yang Fariez dapat/belajar darpada dia. Salah satunya bersedekah Al-fatihah buat keluarga dan kawan-kawan.Die selalu buat macam tu, bila terigat dekat mak abah atau kawan-kawan yang laen, dia akan sedekahkan fatihah untuk diorang.

Fariez pun tiru, buat bende yang sama. Sedekahkan Fatihah selalu buat Mak, Baba, adek beradek dan kawan-kawan yang lain.(Bukan bila orang da meninggal dunia baru kita nak sedekah Al-fatihah) Benda yang nampak simple.Banyak lagi perkara-perkara lain yang dia buat yang secara tidak langsung buat kita rasa nak buat jugak bende tu.Dalam tak sedar selama ni dia adalah role model buat Fariez.

Lalu terfikir..

Kawan betul-betul mempengaruhi kita.Sama ada dia gemuk dan kita turut sama-sama jadi gemuk, atau dia berperwatakan yang molek lalu kita memilih untuk menjadi baik . Itu pilihan sendiri. Yang pasti, jika benda burukla yang kita tiru/terikut-ikut yang salah bukan orang laen. yang salah adalah kita.

Dan dalam masa yang sama kita pun taknak jadi Role Model yang salah.kan.

Self-advise.

Hye Farieza Jaafar. Ini Nasihat untuk kamu:

Look bad. Take a risk. Lose Face. Be yourself. Share yourself with someone.
Open up.Be vulnerable.Be Human. Leave your comfort zone.Get Honest.
Experienced the fear.Do it anyway!

I love you too!

senyum sampai telinga lepas call mak :) 

Kakakdah cakap Selamat Hari Ibu dekat mak.Yeah!

(Selagi tak cakap, selagi tu la rasa macam menanggung beban kat dada)

Mak cakap "Terima kasih. I Love You.."

Then, cepat-cepat akak cakap, "I love u two,three, four Mak!"

P/s :Mak selalu tak percaya, bila akak cakap,
Mak adalah orang yang paaaaaling kakak sayang dalam dunia ni.
(mungkin sebab kakak selalu buat Mak susah hati.Tahun ni akak taknak buat mak sedih-sedih dah )

Paraganglioma- Datin Orchid Abdullah

Fariez da janji nak habiskan 4 lecture opthal malam ni..but  only I managed to read two before i get distracted by the internet!

Penyanyi veteren 60-an yang popular dgn lagu penawar rindu,Datin Orchid Abdullah as reported in the newspapers is currently suffering from han hormon tidak stabil.According to her youngest daughter, it's  paraganglioma.

There's only one hospital in Malaysia yang offer the treatment for that tumour probably bcause it's a very rare tumour.This tumour occurs with an estimated annual incidence of only 1 case per 1.3 million people!! been diagnose having a cancer such a thunderstruck, and having the rare one make it tragic somemore.Her family must be very tough for Allah had chosen them to face all of this...

Her daughter said that a tumour was surgically removed in 2008, however in 2010 her mother was again diagnosed for the same tumour and so it was removed for the 2nd time.But unfortunately, her mother is still ill, still having all the symptoms.and recently, by investigation (CT scan, MRI or something) the doc found that the tumour had spread to skull, backbone, literally, all over her body! Surgical removal is no longer an option, laser is not possible either. :( If i was that Doc, I don't think i can bear that kind of findings. Such a heart-breaking. yeah, the findings is even harder to the families members to accept.

Based on my reading, (from emedicine.medscape) the tumour send metastases only in 4% of cases. which supposedly gave me a huge relieve. in other words, it's rare for the patient to have a spread tumor. but it is vice versa here. Instead of the small percentage, the patient suffers from it. Ya Rabb, give her strength please.. really, this teach me not to take cancer easily and overlook on it just because of the statistics. bcause i might be surprised by the fact that this particular patient is a part the statistic.

Again 4% of the tumour are functional means that it's not just a dumb mass, but capable of secreting clinically significant hormones (catecholamine, dopamine, NE ) and yes she's one of those who having the active secreting mass...

i don't really know how to end this entry..

but well, i do know that she desperately needs a cure. Let's together pray for her freedom from cancer ,and above all,let's pray that Datin Orchid and her familiy stay strong  strong to fight the cancer. Last but not least, Let's together study hard, for we are the one who gonna be the helping hands!Insya Allah.

P/s: i wasn't really interested in medical field before that.but yeah, but it was like years ago.i am a new me, Doc Farieza in a few year!

Taiping - Memoryland

Fariez tak tahu kenapa fariez suka sangat Bandar Taiping. Maybe sebab banyak memori indah tercipta kat sana?? Bila sampai Taiping rasa macam memori-memori tu di re-fresh semula, lalu sebuah filem tanpa bunyi tertayang dlm kotak fikiran..kenangan..

Masa revolusi Mesir, sempat lagi singgah Taiping. Saja nak jalan-jalan.Singgah rumah Opah & cari mee udang kuala Mak Jah.Unfortunately, kedai makan Mak Jah tak bukak hari tu.

Alang-alang da sampai kuale sepetang,kitorang cari jugak la Mee udang. Kedai mana-mana pun tak kisah. (lapar lagi pun) So, ini mee udang dekat-dekat dgn kedai Mak Jah. Sedap!! Fariez puas hati :)

Lepas makan, pergi rumah Opah. Bile sampai-sampai rumah opah berbau durian .Rupanya opah baru je beli durian..ngeh3, puas makan durian.Rehat-rehat jap, lepas tu kami pun bersiap-siap untuk pulang.

Sebelum balik kitorang singgah Taman Tasek Taiping! Jatuh cinta tau dengan tempat ni..Hijau je.. Sejuk mata memandang.

Cantik kan kan kan..Kitorang jalan-jalan je pun, borak-borak.. (tapi berpeluh-peluh jugak la) Tengok orang jogging,tengok orang maen bola, ada yang tangkap udang.. memancing. (boleh ke sebenarnya memancing dekat Taman Tasek Taiping?)

Kalau rumah dekat-dekat sini, mesti fariez datang jogging selalu. ceh berangan.i definitely will apply keje dekat Taiping. Hospital Taiping maybe?

Semua orang ada satu tempat yang die rasa sgt significant dgn diri masing kan.and as for me, it's Taiping!!

oh ya.most of the pics above was photograph by Mr Fairuz. Photography is his passion (but not anymore, i guess). Have look on his Flickr got all his best collections there.

Top 12

how do you interpret this bar chart?
confius on how should i react. should i be happy or be scared!?

Anyways, Tq  PCI (Perubatan Cawanagan Iskandariah) for the traffics.

Get Married soon

Is it the tittle that misdirect u to my blog?? if yes, Sorry..but literally i mmg sengaja pun nk misdirect korang.

anyway, "why i'm sooo in a rush to get married?" seriously that particular quest keeps popping up and like whipping through my mind. Even i'm sick with that question coming from mum,sista, brother and it was like the whole family members keep throwing me the same question. (but friends? u know, they never ask but give full of non-stop support :) )

Well, who is there to be blame. Is it okie, if i  blame the sosial pressure for the tension that i'm abandoned with? because i really hope that i'm anaesthezied from all this social pressure.Get free from this tinge of mind torture. Gosh, why is it hard to believe that every single things come combo with a reasons?


fuhh! Enough.
Anyway, sebenarnya kan Fariez was searching bout How to live moderately as a Muslim (inspired by someone) macam mana ntah boleh misdirect ke entry blog orang.Ala,cerita pasal kawen macam magnetic power,having the forces that pull me towards it and give something like a magnetice excitement/ self-excitement or something ?


uh, merepek je.Assignment tak siap lagi T__T 
okiela rader(s), have a read on this.

1. KETIKA MENCARI CALON

Janganlah mencari isteri, tapi carilah ibu bagi anak-anak . 

Janganlah mencari suami, tapi carilah ayah bagi anak-anak.

2. KETIKA MELAMAR

Anda bukan sedang meminta kepada orang tua/wali si gadis, 

tetapi meminta kepada Allah melalui orang tua/wali si gadis.

3. KETIKA AKAD NIKAH

Anda berdua bukan menikah di hadapan penghulu, tetapi menikah di hadapan Allah.

4. KETIKA RESEPSI PERNIKAHAN

Catat dan hitung semua tamu yang datang untuk mendoa’kan anda, 

kerana anda harus berfikir untuk mengundang mereka semua dan meminta maaf apabila anda 

berfikir untuk BERCERAI kerana menyia-nyiakan do’a mereka.

5. KETIKA MALAM PERTAMA

Bersyukur dan bersabarlah. Anda adalah sepasang anak manusia dan bukan sepasang malaikat.

6. SELAMA MENEMPUH HIDUP BERKELUARGA

Sedarilah bahawa jalan yang akan dilalui tidak melalui jalan bertabur bunga,

 tapi juga semak belukar yang penuh onak dan duri.

7. KETIKA RUMAH TANGGA GOYANG

Jangan saling berlepas tangan, tapi sebaliknya justru semakin erat berpegang tangan

 noted: 7 point of wise words above is kopipes from TARTUS